My Heart Has a Hole

I used to think that the hole in my heart was because of being single, but over the more recent years I’ve realized that this hole is not shaped for any man. There were times when I thought the hole was because I have not yet loved little children with a mother’s love. Then there were the times when great loss was assumed to cause the hole.

However, I’ve journeyed with many individuals, heard their hearts cry, celebrated their hearts joy, and walked alongside their hearts in the normalcy of life. What I have determined is that the hole in my heart, and I assume is somewhere in your heart too, was molded through the years and grows larger as I get older (which is just a few days away J). This hole is delicately shaped and stretched by the hands of God. There have been many passing days where life had purpose, but a lingering gap was present. I have determined this gap to be the reality that my heart misses my True Home.

Tomorrow we recognize it as the day a naked baby-like flying angel with a heart-shaped tipped arrow, also known as Valentine’s Day, and I couldn’t help reflect that tonight is Ash Wednesday. I know many times these two days have fallen close on the calendar, but it seems ironic that one day we celebrate what we think love is: chocolates, celebration with a spouse or the awareness of a lack of one, stuffed animals, and flowers. Then 40 days later we celebrate TRUE LOVE designed to fill every hole in our hearts, but I think the misconception is that our heart will be completely full here on earth. Yet, I would strongly argue that our heart was designed to expand and grow large enough for us to finally understand that our true experience of love will be when we walk into the arms of God.

Many of you are experiencing the love of a valued spouse, there are those of you who have been married for years and wonder “is this all there is”, some of you who have lost your greatest love, others have known the love of parenting only for it to be taken away, then there are those who had love, it ended, and took with it several dreams, and then there are those of us who have come to understand the greatest value of loving one’s life without a spouse. Most of us don’t even care about tomorrow, but we are bombarded with the media’s opinion of the day. It just seems necessary to say, “No matter where your journey is may you hear tomorrow, over the next 40 days, and
throughout the years to come that not only ARE YOU LOVED, but your heart is being shaped to make room for the greatest love of all!”

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